Doughnut Pie

Y2, Week Eleven: Terror Thy Name is Doughnut Pie

When I was a kid my dad would sometimes take us to the local doughnut shop on the weekend. I believe it was called Donut Delights, or maybe Donut Delites, or possibly the Donutorium. Whatever they called it, in reality, it was Hell, presided over by a woman who made the Soup Nazi from “Seinfeld” look like Santa Claus.

She hated us, and by “us” I mean all of humankind. She hated us for wanting doughnuts, for wanting to buy them from her, for coming into her shop, for thinking about buying doughnuts, for ever having eaten a doughnut, and, probably, she hated us most for existing. The terror started the moment you got out of your car and saw her standing behind the counter, hating you. The thick plate-glass window, presumably designed to showcase the delicious wall of doughnuts, the only thing protecting you from her death stare. You immediately began to question whether you really loved doughnuts enough to risk your immortal soul by entering her sugary lair.

If you were foolish enough to continue inside you were forced to endure the gauntlet of pain and psychological torture that was selecting your doughnuts. Heaven help you if you didn’t immediately know exactly how many doughnuts you wanted. “How many.” It was less a question than some sort of implied threat. Less than a dozen doughnuts went into a bag, the selection of a dozen or more necessitated a box, and the transaction would go no further until this was settled. Then, she would stare at you. “What do you want.” Again, not a question. Now anyone faced with a giant wall of a couple dozen varieties of doughnuts knows that this isn’t a decision that can be rushed. She didn’t care. “What do you want! What do you want!” She’d repeat it every five or six seconds, if you listened carefully you could hear the theme from “Jeopardy” playing malevolently in the background.

At this point, your brain was frozen. There were way too many choices and any minute she was going to hurdle the counter and choke you with those little tissue paper squares she used to pick up the doughnuts. You’d blurt out the first thing that came into your fear-locked mind. “Powdered sugar!” Yes, that would buy you some time, you were a fool. Bam! Moving faster than the human eye can register, she’d have it bagged/boxed. “What next.” You were clearly making her late for her appointment to get her horns filed. Aahh! You’d throw out another sacrificial selection. “The chocolate one with the peanuts.” Oh crud, she’d obviously put a hex on you, the crushed peanut doughnuts were what was left for the losers who showed up five minutes before they closed. What where you thinking? “What next.” To avoid her glowing laser eyes, you’d look down. This would turn out to be the biggest mistake of your life, for the case in front of you held all of the filled doughnuts. No one could resist. “Could I have a Bavarian Cream?” She look at you like you were asking for the life of her first-born. “Filled doughnuts are EXTRA!” This warning was clearly meant to convey that anyone who valued their life would forget about the filled doughnuts and continue selecting from the wall. Only the very brave got a filled doughnut.

This danse macabre would continue until you’d finished selecting your half-dozen or more doughnuts. You’d pay her, hoping that maybe one of your panic selections would turn out to be something good and taking satisfaction in noting that the tip jar was totally empty. Then you’d flee the store under the weight of her withering stare. I love doughnuts, but to this day I still tense at the thought of having to buy them.

So when my nephew asked for doughnut pie, I almost didn’t make it. I couldn’t decide between two of my favorite filled doughnuts: the granulated sugar-coated raspberry-filled or the bavarian cream. Then I realized, I’m not a kid anymore, and I’m sure the doughnut nazi lady is long dead, so I CAN be indecisive and have BOTH! Hahahah! Revenge is long coming, but very, very sweet. Here are both the recipes, no extra charge.

Local Foodstuffs:

• Milk from Sassy Cow Creamery.
• Eggs from New Century Farms.

BAVARIAN CREME DOUGHNUT PIE

Doughnut Crust

Note: Do not use this crust recipe to make actual doughnuts. It’s been altered to keep from rising too much, which is great for a crust, but terrible for a stand-alone doughnut.
Adapted from King Arthur Flour’s “Baked Doughnuts”

1 1/4 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 large eggs
2 tbsp vegetable oil
2 tbsp plain greek yogurt

Preheat oven to 375° F.

Mix together the flour, sugar, and salt in a large bowl. In a smaller bowl beat the eggs then whisk in the oil and yogurt until well combined. Pour the egg mixture over the flour mix and gently stir until just combined, be careful not to over mix as this will lead to a toughening of the dough.

Turn dough out onto a well-greased pie pan and gently spread to cover the bottom. Coat a large piece of parchment paper generously with butter and press it, butter side down, into the pan until the dough begins to come up the sides of the pan, but doesn’t overflow. Fill the remaining space with pie weights (or beans or rice).

Bake for 10-12 minutes, or until the dough has cooked enough on the sides to hold its shape. Carefully remove the parchment paper and weights, and continue baking for approx 4-5 minutes. Crust will be pale. Cool.

Bavarian Cream Custard

3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup flour
1 tbsp cornstarch
1/8 tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon (optional)
2 cups half and half
1 egg
1 egg yolk
2 tsp cocoa liqueur or rum

In a medium saucepan over medium heat, combine sugar, flour, cornstarch and salt. Slowly whisk in half and half, constantly stirring until it’s steaming and slightly thickened.

In a separate bowl slowly pour about 1/3 of the hot milk mixture into the egg and egg yolk by whisking constantly. Whisk the egg mixture back into the saucepan with the remaining milk mixture; stirring continuously. Switching to a heat proof spatula, continue to cook until mixture thickens, stirring constantly. At first the mixture with become quite lumpy, keep stirring and eventually it will smooth out and thicken to a pudding-like consistency. Remove from heat, stir in the liqueur or rum and let cool slightly. Then fill the pie shell. Refrigerate for at least 1 hour to allow it to firm before topping with ganache.

Chocolate Ganache

4 oz semisweet chocolate, chopped
4 oz heavy cream
1 tbsp corn syrup

Place chocolate in a microwave safe bowl and heat in 30 second intervals until smooth and glossy (about 1 1/2 minutes). Stir in heavy cream, then corn syrup.

Spoon onto chilled and firm custard. Spread evenly leaving about 1″ of custard showing around the edge. Decorate with whipped cream and grated chocolate if desired. Chill for 3 hours or overnight.

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RASPBERRIES & CREAM DOUGHNUT PIE

Doughnut Crust

Note: Do not use this crust recipe to make actual doughnuts. It’s been altered to keep from rising too much, which is great for a crust, but terrible for a stand-alone doughnut.
Adapted from King Arthur Flour’s “Baked Doughnuts”

1 1/4 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 large eggs
2 tbsp vegetable oil
2 tbsp plain greek yogurt

1 tbsp butter
2 tbsp sugar

Preheat oven to 375° F.

Mix together the flour, sugar, and salt in a large bowl. In a smaller bowl beat the eggs then whisk in the oil and yogurt until well combined. Pour the egg mixture over the flour mix and gently stir until just combined, be careful not to over mix as this will lead to a toughening of the dough.

Turn dough out onto a well greased pie pan and gently spread to cover the bottom. Coat a large piece of parchment paper generously with butter and press it, butter side down, into the pan until the dough begins to come up the sides of the pan, but doesn’t overflow. Fill the remaining space with pie weights (or beans or rice).

Bake for 10-12 minutes, or until the dough has cooked enough on the sides to hold its shape. Carefully remove the parchment paper and weights, and continue baking for approx 4-5 minutes. Crust will be pale. Cool.

In a small microwave safe dish, melt the butter. With a pastry brush, spread a thin layer around the edges of the crust. Sprinkle generously with sugar. Set aside.

Raspberry Cream Custard

3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup flour
1 tbsp cornstarch
1/8 tsp salt
2 cups milk
1 egg
1 egg yolk
1/2 cup frozen raspberries, thawed and crushed
1 tbsp vanilla

In a medium saucepan over medium heat, combine sugar, flour, cornstarch and salt. Slowly whisk in milk, constantly stirring until it’s steaming and slightly thickened.

In a separate bowl slowly pour about 1/3 of the hot milk mixture into the egg and egg yolk by whisking constantly. Whisk the egg mixture back into the saucepan with the remaining milk mixture; stirring continuously. Switching to a heat proof spatula, stir in the berries and vanilla and continue to cook until mixture thickens. At first the mixture with become quite lumpy, keep stirring and eventually it will smooth out and thicken to a pudding-like consistency. Remove from heat and let cool slightly. Then fill the pie shell. Set aside.

Raspberry Glaze

1 cup frozen raspberries, thawed and crushed
1 package gelatin
1 cup sugar
1 tbsp lemon juice

Combine raspberries, gelatin, sugar, and lemon juice in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Cook, stirring constantly, until thickened (about 5 minutes). Remove from heat and immediately press once through a sieve to remove seeds. Set aside to cool to room temperature.

Spoon onto custard. Spread evenly leaving about 1″ of custard showing around the edge. Decorate with whipped cream if desired. Chill for 3 hours or overnight.